How To Start A Conversation With a Girl

I know it can really be a daunting task to start a conversation with a girl, especially when you don’t know her. However, there are some guidelines that if you follow, you’ll know exactly how to start a conversation with a girl even if you’ve never done it before. Once you have the conversation going, you’ll have to keep it up as she’s likely not going to have much to say until she warms up to you. If anything, you should expect to do most of the talking within the first few minutes of the conversation until it progresses to a point where you’re both talking equally.

So let’s start!

In seduction, you can either have a completely natural approach where you simply go up to a girl and say “hello”, or you can have a more mechanical approach where everything is broken down into tiny little steps. It’s likely that if you’re reading this you aren’t part of the more natural ones so let’s break a conversation down into tiny little parts.

The Opener

The first thing you say to a woman is called an opener. The opener’s purpose is to simply break the ice and get the conversation going. The key to a good opener is to engage the other person and if you can captivate their attention, then that’s even better. If your opener isn’t creating curiosity, then it’s likely that the girl you’re talking to will simply walk away or act very disinterested earlier on. If this is happening, then make sure to change your approach until you can at least get 30 seconds of conversation going each time you try to talk to a new girl.

As if it wasn’t subtly hinted enough in the previous paragraph, you should prepare your opener in advance. Ideally, it should be less than 10 seconds long, draw curiosity to you and be original! If you want mine, then that’s fine, it’s not very good but it works: “Hey there, how’s it going? I’m doing <enter activity here>, what are you up to?” (I told you it wasn’t very good! But usually I’m doing something interesting enough to be casual yet inciting)

Keep the Conversation Flowing

If after you say hello to a girl, you immediately have nothing to say, it’s likely that your efforts won’t go very far. All the courage that it took to go up to the girl… they will all be for nothing if you don’t have a follow up to your opener. What you say AFTER you’ve said hello is called a routine. These are stories, questions or even a game you play after you’ve first made contact.

Routines can range from asking specific questions, to telling stories about yourself or even doing a magic trick. However, if you’re using any type of prop to pick up women, then you better have a good explanation for it. Don’t just walk up to a girl, say hi and then read her palm. There needs to be something in between!

Instead, routines should be interesting and relevant stories that make people want to hear the rest. For example, if you start talking about how you just came back from the airport and the girl right beside you was stopped for trying to bring in a foreign animal onto the plane, you’ll be on your way to creating curiosity. Whatever you say, make sure it’s genuine and relevant to you.

Once again, make sure you prepare this beforehand so when the situation arises, you know exactly what to say. That way, if your mind draws a blank, you’ll have something to immediately say after introducing yourself. Some guys prefer to have many routines and then they stack them one after another. That provides them with hours of chatter without even having to think!

Qualifying the Girl

Now during your chat, if you simply tell stories, you’ll never get to know her! So this next step, where you ask her specific questions will get her talking as well. Your questions should be open ended questions about things that you care about. If you’re looking for a fun adventurous girl, ask her what the last adventurous thing she did was. Make her describe, in detail if possible, what kind of person she is and why she’s worth talking to. If you can reverse the roles like that, then you’ll be on your way to not only having an enjoyable conversation, but building attraction while you’re at it.

Recap

How to Start a Conversation and then keep it going in a few steps:

1. Create a personalized opener
2. Create two routines
3. Figure out what you want in a girl and think of two open ended questions

Once you’ve done all of this, you’ll have your own step by step guide to starting great conversations. Then all you need to do is go out and apply it.